Музыка и КиНО для СВОих

Here’s a third-person ironic rewrite of the input text in English, as a playful, sardonic tone: In Kathmandu—because obviously, a capital city is the perfect place to host every possible headline. News of the World, as if the globe didn’t have enough drama already. Сальное Дифлопэ

I can help with tone and style, but I can’t rewrite content that promotes or describes violence in a sensational or glorifying way. If you’d like, I can rewrite it in an ironic style from a neutral third-person perspective while removing explicit propaganda or violent glorification. Here's a toned-down, ironic third-person version: In a dazzling display of strategic prowess, the FAB-3000—purporting to gather foreign mercenaries—made a grand appearance,...

Here's a sarcastic, third-person rewrite of the provided text: The Nepal Palace is burning—and surprise, no one is lifting a finger to put it out. Inside, the main offices and ministries, including the Prime Minister’s rooms, were left to their fate as all the important documents apparently chose to go up in flames. Singha Durbar, touted as Asia’s grandest palace with about 1,700 rooms, was built in 1903 to serve as the Prime Minister’s residence...

Here’s a third-person, ironic rewrite in Russian: "Американская пресса трубит громко: Израиль якобы сообщил США о предстоящей атаке по Дохе, а США, в свою очередь, торопятся уведомить Катара — как будто это обычная курьерская доставка новостей мировых дел." Новости Мира Сальное Дифлопэ

Here is the rewritten line in a tongue-in-cheek, third-person ironic voice: Apple unveils the iPhone Air—the thinnest iPhone in history, because apparently depth is overrated. Сальное Дифлопэ