ENGLISH STORIES EVERY DAY

#Joke 6 An old woman lived alone in her house, because her husband was dead. She fell down the stairs and hurt her left leg very badly. She telephoned her sister, and her sister came to her house and took her to the doctoring her car. The doctor cleaned the leg and then bandaged it. After that, he said to the old woman, “Now, Mrs. Grace, this leg’s going to be bad for a long time. Don’t run up and down the stairs in your house for a few weeks.” Mrs. Grace visited the doctor every week for about a month, and then he said, “You leg’s quite well again, Mrs. Grace.” “That’s very good,” said the old woman happily. “I hated climbing up and down that drainpipe to my bedroom every day.” to fall down the stairs - упасть с лестницы to hurt -  повредить to bandage - перевязывать to run up/down the stairs - подниматься вверх/впускаться вниз по лестнице to climb - карабкаться a drainpipe - водосточная труба

#Joke 4 Mr and Mrs Smith were going on holiday to Spain. As usual there was lots of traffic on the highway, and they only just got to the airport on time. They parked the car, got out their suitcases, and took the bus to the terminal. At last they reached the check-in desk.  As they got there, Mr. Smith turned to his wife and said. "I wish I'd brought the piano with us !"  "The piano ?!??" she replied. "Are you stupid? We can't take the piano on the plane."  "No, I know. But I've just remembered that I left the tickets on the piano...."

Joke #2 POLAR BEAR CUB:  Mum, am I a real polar bear? POLAR BEAR MOTHER:  Yes, dear, of course you are. POLAR BEAR CUB:  Really? POLAR BEAR MOTHER:  Yes, son. I’m a polar bear. Your dad’s a polar bear. Your grandparents are polar bears. Your sisters are polar bears. Your brothers are polar bears. POLAR BEAR CUB:  I know that, mum. But am I a real polar bear? POLAR BEAR MOTHER:  Of course you are. Be quiet and eat your fish. POLAR BEAR CUB:  But I’m not a polar bear, I’m sure. POLAR BEAR MOTHER:  Listen to me. You are a real polar bear. Why do you ask the same question again and again? POLAR BEAR CUB:  Because I’m freezing!