MODELS OF OUR PERSONALITY.
In our superficial consciousness, personal problems sometimes seem unclear and difficult to solve. It is also sometimes difficult for us to understand the actions and feelings of others. We cannot properly understand ourselves or others. However, the human psyche is not so complicated. Simply put, the personality structure is divided into several parts. Thus, in us, there are child and adult manifestations of personality, as well as conscious and unconscious levels of the psyche. Knowing the structure of the personality, you can work with it consciously and solve many problems that previously seemed insoluble.
Knowing the structure of the personality, you can work with it consciously and solve many of the problems that seemed previously unsolvable.
"The Inner Child is a metaphor for describing the unconscious parts of our personality that bear the imprint of childhood. The inner child is subject to feelings: fear, pain, sadness, rage, joy, happiness and love. Thus, along with the positive component, this part of our psyche has negative and sad sides.
Together with the inner child, there is an adult self, the so-called "inner adult". This mental structure includes all rational and reasonable, that is, our thinking. In adult mode, we can take responsibility, plan our actions, be prudent, weigh the risks and, of course, regulate the manifestations of the child's self. Adult, I act consciously and thoughtfully.
Sigmund Freud, by the way, was the first one to identify different parts in the personality structure. I called the adult Freud just "I". He also singled out the so-called "Super-I". The latter is a kind of moral structure within us, which in modern psychology is called the "I" or "inner critic". When an "inner critic" says "inner critic" in us, we often think: "Don't be a fool! You're nothing and you can't do anything! You will never do that!
New therapeutic approaches, one of which is schematic therapy, subdivide these three main structures of the child, adult and parent's "I" into additional parts, such as "traumatized inner child", "joyful inner child", "angry inner child", "punishing" and "benevolent" parental "I". The famous Hamburg psychologist Schultz von Thun has developed a number of subpersonalities living inside a person and introduced the term "inner team".
HOW THE LOVED ONES ARE SHAPING OUR BELIEFS
Our subconscious installations have a great influence on this. Psychological attitudes are understood as deeply rooted beliefs that are expressed in relation to oneself or in interpersonal relationships.
Many beliefs arise in the early years of life during the interaction between the child and loved ones. For example, it may sound like this: "I'm good!", or vice versa: "Something is wrong with me! As a rule, we learn both positive and negative attitudes during childhood and subsequent life. Positive things like "I'm good" came up in situations where we felt loved and accepted by loved ones as we are. Such settings make us stronger. Negative beliefs such as "Something is wrong with me", on the contrary, occurred in situations where we felt rejected and unrecognized. They make us weaker.
Recent neurobiological studies have shown that children who have experienced severe stress in their first years of life, such as indifference to them, have increased their stress hormone levels for the rest of their lives.
This makes adults vulnerable to various levels of stress: they react more strongly and acutely to stressors and are therefore mentally less resilient than people who were more likely to experience confidence and security in childhood.
Of course, subsequent years of personal development are also important and leave their mark. And, of course, in addition to parents, there are other people who can influence us: grandparents, teachers, and classmates. But in this book, I would like to limit myself to the influence of parents or other close people on the formation of the personality because otherwise, the book will become very voluminous.
I am the first two years of my life, even though they leave their traces in the subconscious. Most people remember themselves from the age when they went to kindergarten or later. Since then, we have consciously remembered how we were treated by Mom and Dad and how we treated them.
WHY SELF-KNOWLEDGE HELPS TO SOLVE PROBLEMS
Reflexion and analysis are psychologists' favorite words and they have their reasons. A reflexive person has good access to his or her inner motivations, feelings and thoughts and can find their psychological connections with actions. Because he or she also takes into account his or her dark sides, he or she can consciously manage them.
Thus, for example, he may notice in time that the lack of sympathy for a colleague is less explained by his unpleasant qualities and is rather caused by envy of his success. As soon as a person admits to this, he will most likely come to the conclusion that it would be unfair to harm a colleague. He has a good chance to maintain a good relationship at work and to manage his envy from the inside.
It is through understanding this feeling that he can find a positive way out of this situation. Perhaps by focusing on his achievements and on other reasons to be grateful. If this person did not recognize the fact that the other person's successes hurt his own ego, then unconsciously he would have sought to belittle the more successful colleague in the eyes of others.
This small example shows that it is important not only to find a solution to one's own problems but also to behave consciously in society. Self-knowledge and reflexion are not only important for an individual, but also for social value.
This primarily concerns feelings such as powerlessness and loss. If left unchecked, they can be reborn as a hypertrophied desire for power and recognition. In some situations, due to lack of self-reflection, politicians may show a thirst for power that can destroy entire nations.
Therefore, my intention is to prove to readers that self-knowledge is not only the shortest way to get rid of personal problems but also a great opportunity to become better.
Self-knowledge is not only the shortest way to get rid of personal problems, but also a great opportunity to become better.