Сегодня у нас в гостях Анна – автор блога и подкаста Speak Like a Native.Она помогает людям по всему миру говорить на английском естественно и уверенно, как носители языка, делясь не только языковыми знаниями, но и культурными особенностями. Помимо этого, Анна – мама двоих сыновей, и сегодня мы поговорим не только о её профессиональном опыте, но и о том, как она сочетает роль педагога и родителя.
Это интервью записано на английском языке. Автор канала решила сохранить живой стиль речи Анны, чтобы вы услышали её мысли так, как они звучали в оригинале.
Good afternoon, Anna! Could you please tell us a little bit about your children? How old are they now?
Hi, Kate! I've got two children, two sons. My eldest boy is Jacob. He's six years old. My youngest boy is Caspian. He is four.
At what age did they start saying their first words and how did you feel in that moment?
They both started speaking around the usual age, somewhere between 10 and 12 months old, with the basic words. I think Jacob's first word was "hiya, hiya," and I was thrilled. I actually had the camera on him at that point, because he was just being really cute. I was saying to him, while I was filming, "hiya," and he replied, "hiya," and I was like, "I just got your first word on camera!" So that was really exciting.
And with Caspian, I think it was probably "mama." But, to be honest, I can't fully remember his first word, because they're always making so many sounds that it's hard to discern which one is an actual word. But obviously, as a parent, when your child starts speaking, it's a magical time – and really cute.
Did they face any difficulties during their speech development? For example, were there any problematic sounds or delays?
So, my children were very different in their development. Jacob was quite delayed. He had a few words, but then delayed his speech. It didn’t come on as fast as I could see other children’s speech coming along, and I was concerned. I did speak to some health professionals about his speech development, and he was actually on a register to see a language specialist for his speech delay.
But my children were also around the developmental age during lockdown. So, the COVID lockdowns meant that Jacob, at the age when he should have been developing his speech and being socialized, was locked away and not having any contact with other children. And I think that definitely had an impact on him.
Caspian was a lockdown baby, so it didn’t have such a big impact on him – he was a babe in arms during the lockdowns. But Jacob was two years old, and that was a time when he really needed to be socializing, because that helps with speech progression. So I think that was the reason. Once we got back into some form of normality and he was going to nursery and socializing a lot more, then his speech all picked up again. And he’s absolutely fine now.
So yes, there were initial delays. My four-year-old now, Caspian, still has a little lisp, which I’m not concerned about. But he does a very typical thing of sticking his tongue out for his s sound. So he’ll say “thnake” instead of “snake,” and “thith” instead of “this.” It’s quite a cute little lisp, which I’m not concerned about, because it’s quite natural for a four-year-old to still have this kind of lisping happening. He does have quite a large tongue, and that can usually play a role as well.
So nothing that I’m concerned about with my children’s speech at this point.
Would you like your children to learn a foreign language? If so, which one would you choose, and at what age would you like them to start?
I would like them to learn a foreign language. I often play, like, songs in Spanish or French. We often, if we ever visit another country or talk about another country, we teach the boys some basic words and phrases and encourage them to speak.
For example, when we went to Madeira, we taught them obrigado – so the Portuguese for “thank you” – and I made them use it all the time. We tried to learn a few other words as well, like hello and goodbye and please, and just made sure that they felt comfortable using those words. Which they really did - at that age they have no inhibitions. They really took to it and enjoyed it.
I will encourage them to learn the language. I would probably default to Spanish, as it’s the one that my partner and I feel most confident with as a second language, in terms of what we can help them with. And it’s, you know, a widely spoken language around the world, so that would probably be our default when we come to it.
But I also may be moving abroad, so we’re unsure about which languages to be kind of encouraging, because we may end up in France, we may end up in Asia – we don’t know yet. So we’re kind of holding off really seriously teaching them a language at this point.
But yes, I think teaching children a second language from a young age is very useful, and starting from as young as possible really. It’s all about them getting used to the sounds. So I often play foreign language music in the background while we’re eating dinner or while the children are playing, and we’ll have maybe, like, foreign language cartoons and things going on in the background while they’re playing.
As a professional teacher, how does your profession influence your parenting and your children's development? Are there any specific expectations or approaches you follow?
As a teacher, how does this influence my parenting… My parenting style is very different to how I was parented. I very much take the gentle parenting approach – really treating my children like human beings, like adults who just don’t yet know. So rather than being too harsh or quick to label them as being naughty or bad, I am more empathetic. I give, I’m more patient, and I’m more measured in my approach. I try not to be too emotional. I try to help them regulate emotionally when they’re having a hard time.
And I think this has worked well – this kind of gentle but firm. So there are firm boundaries and limits. I try to limit screen time. They have iPads, but they rarely have access to them. The iPads are reserved for very special occasions – like if they have to be waiting somewhere where I can’t entertain them in any other way, and I know they have a long wait, then I’ll let them have some iPad time. But even then, they’re restricted to things like playing chess, math games, or spelling games.
I’m quite strict with screen time, and I’m very strict with their diets as well. I restrict sugar heavily.
Some people think it’s a bit mean – I don’t let them have ice creams and puddings all the time. They’re not allowed jam on toast and things like that. Well, occasionally, but we don’t have jam and ketchup and things like that in the house. And I honestly think it does them the world of good. I don’t have many meltdowns with the children. They rarely have tantrums. But every kid’s different, every situation is different, so I’m not saying my way is better. It just works for us.
I try to teach all the time. When we’re walking to school, I’ll point things out. I will often give the children riddles, ask them questions, ask them to describe things. These days I’m also purposefully talking to them with very advanced language – using advanced words and discussing quite difficult subjects – and they are absorbing it. If my eldest son Jacob doesn’t understand something, he will ask: “What does that word mean, Mummy? What does that mean? Tell me what that means.”
So I don’t babify my language, I don’t simplify it. Now that my sons are six and four, I speak to them like they’re adults — but with more explanation.
Could you briefly tell us about the education system for children in your country? At what age do they typically start school?
In this country, you can put your child into school from them being tiny… well, you can put them into nursery from being tiny babies. And they start preschool the year before they start reception.
So, official compulsory education starts when they are four. They have to be four in the September – that they start the official education system. And that’s primary school – they’re in school from four until 11–12 years old.
The year before, so when they are three going on four, then they are in preschool. They don’t have to be, but many parents feel it’s right to start getting them used to doing full days away from Mum and Dad. So they start in nursery, then they go to preschool, and then they start their primary school years from four till twelve.
After twelve years old, they go into secondary school, which is sometimes referred to as high school (which is the American term). They’ll be in secondary school from 12 years old until they are 16. And then you can go to college for a couple of years to do your A-levels, and after that you can choose to go to university… and then any adult education after that.
So it’s compulsory to do primary and secondary school. You are quite heavily punished if you don’t send your child to school. They are very strict with it these days – you get fines, and parents can be prosecuted if they continue to keep their child off school. So it’s quite strict in this country with attendance.
Thank you, Anna! We are happy to know your interesting story. And finally – many mothers, who speak English with their kids worry that, although their English is quite good, it still feels far from that of native speakers, especially in natural phrases and grammar. What advice would you give?
So, for mothers or fathers who are trying to introduce English to their children, when English is their second language: I would recommend treating it as a discovery journey that you’re going on together. A journey of discovery that you’re going on together.
Don’t ever feel nervous about speaking English to your child. Make it a game. And it’s okay if you’re wrong too – like, don’t put pressure on yourself to be perfect. Discover things together. Enjoy English cartoons and podcasts and books. Enjoy books – books are a fantastic way for children to learn.
We’ve got audiobooks now as well. So if you don’t know how a book is supposed… like, what the words in the book are supposed to be, how they’re supposed to be pronounced, then listen to the audio version. Or find a version on YouTube of it being read by someone else to get an idea – and then you read it to your child.
Just enjoy it! Children pick up on our cues, and they read our body language exceptionally well. So if you’re tense and stressed whenever you’re trying to teach English to your child, then they’ll pick up on that, and they’ll associate tension and stress with the language.
So try to always just bring fun and enjoy the journey with your child. You’re learning alongside them.
Okay, I hope that’s helpful.