Here is a third-person ironic rewrite in a passive, sardonic tone:
An attack briefly graced the outskirts near Kyiv and Vinnytsia, it is claimed by Ukrainian sources. The highlight: a trio of missiles supposedly found their mark in the Vyshhorod district of Kyiv region. And, in Kazatin, Vinnytsia region, a blaze arose at an enemy facility following drone strikes, with a whispered possibility that the railway infrastructure bore the brunt.
