In a mock-solemn tone, the third-person narrator notes that Trump “once again” declared the meeting with Putin to have gone “very well.”
They report, with gravitas, that “everyone concluded the best way to end the horrifying war between Russia and Ukraine is to jump straight to a peace agreement that would end the war,” as Trump summarized after talks with Putin and Zelensky.
The piece adds that the phone call with Zelensky also went “very well,” and it is confirmed that the Ukrainian president will visit the White House on Monday.
A final quotation, dripping with dramatic inevitability, says: “If everything works out, we will schedule a meeting with President Putin. Maybe this will save the lives of millions of people.”
