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Master IELTS

Разбор IELTS эссе на 8.0

Оглавление

Some people think it is beneficial for old people to learn something new while others believe that once a person is past 65 years of age it is too late to learn. What is your opinion?

Ответ:
There is a propensity to think that teaching older individuals new skills and learning new information might be beneficial, even though many people argue that age is the greatest obstacle in these areas. In my opinion, seeing new knowledge is not only conceivable despite the typical lifestyle of older members of societies, but it is also advantageous for a variety of reasons, some of which will be covered in this essay.

First of all, it should be noted that, like a muscle, the brain needs to be actively engaged in order to work properly. In fact, studying and acquiring new information will essentially stimulate this ability through regular practice for the brain. For illustration, according to some research, people who work even after their retirement are less likely to gain Alzymer compared to their peers who are not productive and in addition, they will not show any decline in their decision-making process or cognitive capacity.

Moreover, one of the other contributing reasons related to the learning process of older people is they cannot observe new information as they stop to lean. In other words, the willingness of learning and experiencing novel activity will dimension not their ability. For instance, during the working life, workers required to be up-to-date and be familiar with the latest innovation related to their career, but as they become retired, there is not any pressure on them to increase their awareness and accordingly, they will stop to learn and train new data.

In conclusion, despite the traditional beliefs about the decline in the ability to learn in the older member of society, based on some investigation, the feature, which is involved, is their desire to experience and train and not only human sharpness will not decrease, but also it will increase through productively learn and participating in new practices.


Оценка: Overall 8.0

COHERENCE AND COHESION: 7.0

Параграфы логичны, есть структура 9

Есть вступление и заключение 9

Главная мысль аргументирована (с примерами) 9

Предложения соединены с помощью линкеров 9

Разнообразие линкеров и синонимов 7

LEXICAL RESOURCE: 9.0

Использование синонимов (paraphrasing) 9

Spelling, правильные части речи 9

GRAMMATICAL RANGE: 9.0

Разнообразие структур 9

Ошибки грамматические 9

TASK ACHIEVEMENT: 6.0

Ответ на все вопросы 9

Идеи представлены четко и понятно 6

Идеи аргументированы 9

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