One girl actively defends her loneliness and condemns her family life, and the other as if she doesn't think about it, enjoying everything around her. It seems that such different girls, but they have one thing in common - there is no man in their lives now.
In one magazine I was attracted by a letter from a reader called "Comfortable living alone". In it the author criticizes family life, and as a counterbalance describes all the benefits of loneliness. The girl is not stingy with stories about difficult family life with detailed descriptions of all hardships and deprivations. The husband in the story is described as a big child who is not able to heat up dinner on his own, and children - such mini-tzarsarsis, which bring and serve. In general, the image of the wife is associated with a maid, a cook who has no right to their personal joys.
In contrast to all the terrible suffering, described the life of a single girl, who, almost like in the movie "Girls", says: "And I will not marry at all! One is better! I want halva, I want gingerbread. There is complete freedom and relaxation from all the above concerns. Life is described in pink as if all the problems come from the family.
After reading the letter, it is very difficult to call such a girl happy. After all, she does not live and do not enjoy her life, and tries to actively protect her loneliness (even in magazines).
Are there other girls, free and happy? Definitely there is. Unlike the heroine described above, they do not fight windmills and do not prove anything to anyone. They just live and rejoice, realizing their creative potential (they are fond of cooking, fine arts, photography and many others).
Is it possible to achieve such a state? Yes, having made certain steps:
1. freeing up the wardrobe! Everyone can have their own skeletons in the closet, but it is better to clear a place for new interesting desires and dreams. Defending "the right to be alone" can be a sign of trying to escape from pain. Perhaps there is something to be completed and released. The past often prevents us from moving forward.
2. Forgiving married women, especially friends, and letting them live their lives. Stop feeling sorry for them! Yes, it's possible that friends could choose someone better or be a free artist too, but they made their choice. And since you can't change the situation here, it's always up to you to change your attitude towards her!
3. By changing the circle of your communication. If you spend most of your time on the phone with two married friends, it's time to change it immediately. Expand your interests, visit new places, get acquainted and communicate with new people!
4. Making yourself and your life the main focus of your attention! Where your attention is directed, your energy goes there. Now almost everything that surrounds you every day, struggles for your attention (advertising, TV, the Internet and even your married friends). It is important to understand that by giving energy to them, you do not live and enjoy your life. Direct attention, love and energy towards yourself. And when that energy becomes abundant, you can easily share it with others.
5. Becoming grateful! Gratitude carries a whole charge of positive energy. If you visited a webinar, or went to some interesting activity, or a consultant in the store just amazingly understood and offered what you need - do not be stingy with gratitude. Say sincerely: "Thank you! Or write a review, because it will not only please a person, but also charge you, provided that you do it with all your heart!
Alas, people become miserly for positive emotions. It seems to them that if they share their joy or gratitude, they will have little. But they are not! The more you give, the more you get, and it works.
If now you choose loneliness for yourself, it is your choice, and you can choose to be happy or unhappy in it. And if the choice is frustrating, change it boldly! Choose something that will bring you joy!