Adoptive children are human beings, so our feelings and experiences can vary and take on very different nuances.
1. Adoptive children are not like the ones you see in movies. Adopted children are just children. They are not damaged goods. They are children who have endured difficulties unimaginable to many of us; children who deserve security, peace and love. Thousands of these sweet faces become "too big" for the system at the age of eighteen, still without a family of which one can feel part.
2. Adopted people have mixed feelings about adoption. Some adopted people will always suffer the loss of their biological family, or of the life they would have lived, and they choose not to be "grateful", but this is their prerogative.
3. Adoption should not be a secret or anything to be ashamed of. If you've always known, that's it - you never get the feeling that they're hiding something from you. If you became a parent after an adoption, tell your child Till he starts. Be honest and keep communication channels open.
4. Adoption is not a fallback option for starting a family; it is simply a different path. Not everyone who adopts is affected by infertility.
5. Some say "I have been adopted", others "I am an adopted child"; in both cases, we are also many other things. Please don't refer to an adopted child as "the adopted child of...". He either speaks for everyone and I don't, but I will always fight so that everyone has a chance to speak.
u she's just a little girl. In her head today, she probably sees herself as a cowboy or a dancer. When he grows up he can become a doctor, a parent, a parent, a friend, a dog lover or a weaver of wicker baskets. That there are also a million other things.
6. It's not fair to judge or evaluate what kind of adoption is best, but it will happen; others always have their opinions. Whether it's foster care, national or international adoption, the goal is always to give a child a loving home. It's a good thing and it's all that matters.
7. There are adopted people who feel the need to find their biological parents to express their point of view, or perhaps to seek a new beginning, but not all of them. Other adoptive children are looking for parents because they are motivated by an authentic need to establish a relationship. They have the right to prove everything they want about their adoption.
8. The words and reactions of the parents are important. Some children are given up for adoption for a loving and thoughtful choice of biological parents from birth, others because their parents have somehow disappointed them. Whatever the reason, if your child arrived because of an adoption, he never speaks ill of his biological family. If you do, he may perceive it as his own judgment.
9. Reality is not determined by biology. Adoptive mothers are REAL mothers. Adoptive fathers are real fathers. True in all possible ways. This reality is not defined by DNA, but by LOVE.
10. Adoption is often based on pain or loss. The suffering of biological parents and why they gave their child up for adoption. The trauma of a child who, in his life, has seen things that no child should see. Poverty and death in the countries of origin. It is not adoption that causes these injuries; adoption is often the best solution to difficult situations.
11. Parents : There is no voice or opinion on adoption more important than that of your child. I think people are making adoption a more important issue than it is. If you are an adoptive parent, listen to YOUR child because in the end, of all the bells that you will hear about adoption, it is the most important. Let your child guide you.
So when you hear that a person has been adopted, or you realize that because they don't look like the rest of the family, many stereotypes about adoption are unfounded. Parents, love your children and meet their needs, whether they relate to adoption or not........ Because that's what parents do.