Oh, how annoying that girl was to me!
Her words sounded like a bell nabbath in my head, making me laugh back. My whole nature ordered me to run away because I knew I wouldn't be able to keep my word, I'd be rude. But I didn't want to be rude to her anymore.
I remembered how I once argued with myself about wanting to rip her throat out with my teeth. How stupid of me to deny the obvious. By giving up my feelings. But how could I, a man without a heart line, feel even a small fraction of what others were allowed to feel? Now, I knew clearly that all I wanted so passionately was to hold Pauline to myself, to hide my love from everyone. I hated the fact that she might belong to someone else. Pauline Fenshawe was my part. It was time to stop denying it. Things will change today. It's now or never.
- Did you decide to run away?
Well, that's it. That's enough! Ignoring her witty gaze, I dragged the boat to the water. Inside, everything was bubbling with irritation. Why did she manage to get me out of balance so easily? I caught myself thinking I wanted to throw a nasty girl in the water. It's a pity it wouldn't do any good. Angrily, she won't resist me, and she'll be one more sailor. That's when I will definitely fail. We will be on the mermaid for a week with Lisa to avoid all water bodies.
Coming up, I reached out to the girl in silence. And, looking at Pauline's perplexing smile, I couldn't stop her from smiling, not only confusing her even more, but frightening her. But it was a pleasure to see her reaction. The victory smile just froze on my lips: I can make you feel good!
- What... what do you want? - The little Water Witch's cockiness blew away like a wind.
- Are you really afraid? - I laughed, laughing with my soul.
- You can't wait!
A cold hand with graceful fingers lay in my freckled palm, allowing me to take myself to the boat. I felt that Pauline was more of a habit to resist. Her eyes lit up with a strange excitement I had never noticed before. She kept licking her dry lips as I concentrated on making the boat get into the middle of Nischenka.
Interesting.
The sun was long gone, and it got noticeably colder. The air was hanging from barely noticeable droplets of dew droplets that fell on our hair and shoulders, hiding us foggy. I watched Pauline, trying to remember every line as she carefully looked away, playing with her fingers and the river. Her fragile bones seemed to be broken with an awkward hug, and her skin was so transparent as if woven from the surrounding water. Her hair had grown, but Pauline had put it in her ponytail for some reason. I wanted to dissolve them, to look at them with my fingers.
I remembered her sticking a kite feather into her hair at the ball. What was that? A joke? Or was Watery thinking about me?
- I can turn around if you want to study me in detail.
Her voice was definitely copying my intonation. Well, rightly, I smiled. But then I frowned on my eyebrows, anticipating her question. You don't have to be Airborne to understand what Pauline was thinking.
- Seva," the girl across the hall raised her tired eyes from the rainy sky, "why am I here?
- I don't know," I answered honestly. And then I frowned again.
Couldn't I really admit so quickly that I had recently become weak with her? I looked up to Pauline. I wanted her to see for herself what was going on between us, to see that I couldn't go on without her. I can't and I don't want to.
She was sitting across the hall with her hands around her shoulders. Pauline was wearing a simple blue short-sleeved dress today. Because she lost a lot of weight, it looked a little baggy on her. The whole posture of Waterman shouted that she was uncomfortable alone with me. Her legs were crossed, her body tense as if she were trying to become as discreet as possible, skillful in the excitement of her lips, which I desperately wanted to kiss... Such closeness, however, could be understood. I never gave a reason to think that I was sympathetic to her.
- You were cold
- Thank you.
Again, the silence, filled with her reproach and my indecision. I was getting more and more frowned upon, and Waterwoman was still playing with water, sending circles across the blackened surface. Her movements were so gentle and weightless.
Will it ever touch me?
And then I made up my mind. Following an obscure impulse, or maybe the will of my heart, I suddenly said it confusedly, afraid to change my mind:
- Pauline, do you remember when I said in the summer that I wouldn't charge you for flying the Raven? I want you to know. I like you. It's all about that.
- You gotta be kidding me.
Nothing outright surprise was so sincere. Is it really... No. You can't hope for reciprocity. I shook my head, hiding hope in my eyes with long bangs:
- I'm not kidding.