Regained consciousness unexpectedly and sharply, as if someone cried to him on an ear. A sun lighted simply in a person. He was in a stranger house on stranger. Examined itself - almost all but already almost nothing hurts. Strange.
- That does he do here?
- You regained consciousness in time. - somebody's voice was heard suddenly, and he saw Otae with a tray in hands. She suited and sat down alongside. - Now exactly dinner.
- Nothing needs me. I gather and go. - wanted already to get up and go, but she held him, not giving to do it. Hidzikata glanced on her angrily. - Take away a hand, women.
- You will dine, because was at more than week. Kondo-san said in addition,, that if you will not obey me and come in Shunsengumi in such state, then he you will simply throw out from there, and Okita-san added, that this time exactly will nail you.
A dark man smiled mentally. And then narrowed eyes.
- Why did I welter here so long?
- I gave to you somnolent. Otherwise, you a long ago escaped from here, and all my efforts would be vain.
Nothing answered on it. Only began to search cigarettes and cigarette-lighter. But they for some reason were nowhere.
- will Dine - will get them. - Otae smiled, watching his searches.
it is Blackmailer. - Toshuro muttered, not less than attracting a tray those to itself. It is better to agree and deafen the piercing trills of stomach. And there it will be evidently.
- Why did you it do? - he asked after some time, delaying and finally filling lungs desirable nicotine.
- My father died, when I was small. I know that to lose such near man. - Otae answered, taking away an empty tray. - And that you there gathered to die of wounds, nothing gave you. Early to you yet to join Mitsybi-san.
- From where to know you? Maybe, exactly time?
- And to whom will it become more easily from it? To your friends hardly.
- I do not have friends.
- Wrong.
- Silent. I did not gather to follow by her. There are not foolish.
- Here and live farther. Only... Do not push away from itself people. you do this only worse.
- To whom? I am a samurai. I am cold, cruel and selfish. I killed and kill people. In my life there can not be a place of love and to other happiness. I am doomed onWind of new hope
Hidzikata Toshuro sat under the walls of and smoked, covered in indifferent sky that no less indifferently poured him cold and by the same indifferent rain.
And all was yet good in the day-time. In the day-time there was Yamazaki with a dull hair-do and incredibly sharp taste in to the mouth some vermin from that eyes climbed on forehead and felled a fire from a throat, but that he, nevertheless, to eight. In the day-time there was an idiot Sogo, that again tried to kill him, and again without result. In the day-time he tracked down contraband an illegal weapon and thought of every to the fool.
And yet in the day-time was living she.
Okita.
He did not want to climb, to invite to, to meet with her even by looks, did not want again to move the past a heart painfully to compress.
Not less than started to climb those, invited, met looks, and the past again by sickly mentions, from what heart that - as all think - for him it is not, painfully broke from breasts.
Why did not he remains with her? She loved him, and then, presumably, sincerely and from all heart. But...
He is a samurai. And a samurai does not have a right fortunately and, moreover, on love.
And if honestly, then he did not simply want to imperil her, did not want to abandon her, if he will perish. And such possibilities enormous amount, in fact he is a samurai.
He was closed from her, hidden after the mask of cold indifference and ignoring. Considered that so it will be better. And for her, and for him. He had the hatred of Sogo, on that to him, already, certainly, it was.
He knew that did not suit to her, wanted, that she found the real happiness somewhere, with somebody else, real that would do her truly happy, that she loved truly, and would have the real family with him. And he simply from one side would watch her and, maybe, was even glad for her.