The premise of educating children is to understand children. This is the most basic principle of education. Without knowing children, there is no way to educate children.
Obviously children are very different, but the growth of children is regular. Every child is a subject because he has different characteristics.
The right education is the best education.
A lot of parents told me: "Mr. Sun, we have heard reports from many experts and read a lot of books, but it doesn't work for my children."
In fact, the opinions of any expert, including the methods introduced in any book, cannot be used simply. You must combine it with the actual situation of your child because suitable education is the best education.
Children are different, each child is a unique world, so we can't educate your own children with a unified standard such as Harvard girls, Yale boys, Peking boys, and Tsinghua girls.
But now the mistake we made is precisely here. The reason why China's family education is now difficult is because we have used a model approach to ask for a wide variety of children.
A global survey published by HSBC in 2014, The Value of Education, shows that in China, almost all (97%) of the parents surveyed want their children to go to university, and about three-quarters (74%) of their parents want their children. Continue to pursue postgraduate studies.
Of course, it can be understood that high education is convenient for the formation of high-quality children, which is conducive to his employment and happy life.
Another 54% of parents ask their children to get a Ph.D.
What does this data mean? This is absolutely impossible for most parents.
Even today, as Chinese universities continue to expand their enrollment, parents’ high expectations cannot be realized.
Of course, some big cities have higher admission rates, but the proportion of the whole of China is still very low, and the proportion of doctors is even lower. More than half of the parents are asking their children to get a Ph.D. in the future. This goal is difficult to achieve.
Wang Shuxiao of Hunan University conducted a systematic survey of parents' educational will in 2013. According to the survey data, 32.77% of the children are very much expected to be admitted to key schools, and 49.36% of the children have a natural attitude towards the key schools. And 64.6% of parents are very much expecting their children to be admitted to key schools, the proportion is significantly higher than the child's self-expectation. Parents' expectations are about twice the child's self-expectations.
What should I do? Such a request will cause the child to have a sense of frustration and failure because he has no way to fulfill your expectations. And how the child wants to meet the wishes of the parents, the child feels: I am happy to satisfy my parents. But your request is too high, he can't do it, and he only has to fail. The side effect of this failure is very big.
Genius is the path that suits him.
A good education must be an education that creates a good environment. It must be an education that respects individuality and respects differences. The success of man lies in the choice, the genius is to choose the road that suits him, and the fool is to choose the path that is not suitable for him.
How to choose? Professor Howard Gardner of Harvard University put forward the famous theory of multiple intelligence, which is a theoretical system and very valuable.
He said:
Everyone has at least eight intelligences, but each person's intelligent structure is different, the combination is different, and the mystery lies in the difference in the combination of intelligent structures.
Which eight intelligence do people have? There are language intelligence, mathematical logic intelligence, space intelligence, music intelligence, body motion intelligence, interpersonal intelligence, introspection intelligence, and natural intelligence.
As everyone thinks, they understand that writers and speakers must be developed with language intelligence.
Accountants, auditors, and mathematicians must be developed with mathematical logic intelligence.
Architects and painters are developed in spatial intelligence.
Others are well-developed body sports, like the winners of various sports in the Olympics and World Championships, and the dancers are all developed with physical motor intelligence. We can cite many examples.
Others are intelligently developed in interpersonal relationships. Some people engage in public relations or leadership, and they will coordinate relations. This is the intelligence of communication.
Others have developed music intelligence. For example, if we have not learned music, we will sing. Some people will sing very well, and some people will not sing in life. This is not a question of hard work. This is the difference in intelligence, which is influenced by various factors such as heredity.
You see the Olympic champions, there are many performing stars, their lives are very brilliant, but many of these people may not have good cultural lessons, or they may be very bad. They just choose the road that suits them. So successful.
