Zinochka’s life was somehow faded and flat. Always.
And when she was still living with her parents. They drove her to the country every weekend. This is the garden they called it. Once, "in the days of prejudice," my mother was given five acres of plowed land at work. And they began to create a “suburban paradise” with dad. They planted some kind of purebred strawberries there, which was supposed to bear fruit for almost the entire summer, the skinny colds of apple trees and pears. Such, probably, our astronauts should have carried in rockets to other worlds, believing that "apple trees will bloom on Mars as well." And at the same time they created a house. Of brick, real, under a slate roof, where there was one tiny room and a porch, with a storage room enclosed on it under garden tools.
That's for the sake of this magnificence and they got up all summer with the first rays of the sun, grabbed the half-sleeping Zinochka with them and rushed to the number two bus, which drove summer residents from all over their small town towards the airport, without reaching which, all this crowd loaded with buckets and shovels fell out. The bus "lost weight" and drove on half-empty, and summer residents, shining with the eyes of their owners, rushed almost trot to their garden plots in order to build a secure and well-fed future for their families. The little zeal in a white panama hat for all these people and a rake could hardly be seen.
She already wanted to eat and drink, but ... Parents didn’t take anything edible with them, because it was planned that they would “quickly, in the cold” remake everything and return home to have time to rest on the eve of the coming Monday in front of the TV. "Chill" was delayed until three in the afternoon, when the half-dead Zinochka didn’t want to eat anymore.
That's why she "gave" and hated all the fibers of her soul as soon as she could hate the young, free-thinking creature of ten years old.
When Zinochka grew up and studied already in the first and second courses of the local construction and road institute, they still dragged her to the cottage. Even when the summer session began. Parents were calmer: the child was in front of his eyes. Zinochka lay in the tall grass by the road and read her textbooks on water supply and sewerage, on filling roads and concrete pavement, and on Monday went to exams, which she passed, however, well.
When, after graduation, father and mother, with a difference of one year, went to another world, the first thing Zinochka did as her legal heiress was to sell a summer house. At once. With a deeply vengeful feeling. At first, there was even a thought, but not whether to burn it to the ground, so that they could twist on the ashes, rubbing the ashes that they hated. But common sense prevailed. And she spent the proceeds from the sale of property on the repair of another property - her two-room apartment, so that nothing reminds me of the past wretched life in her righteousness.
And the beginning of Zinochka on her own means to exist ... The beginning, therefore ...
But this life turned out to be surprisingly similar to dad's life with his mother. Only without a summer residence. Only alone.
She worked in the office by specialty, that is, she “supplied and drained water”: not herself, of course, she is an engineer. Sorted through papers and made up. And the team turned out to be almost one hundred percent female. They had Fedor Stepanovich, an electrician, and Seryozha the plumber. Fedor Stepanovich was a married old man under fifty. But Seryozha is a little older than Zinochka. And although in the mornings he always had a blow, he liked him. Therefore, after they once celebrated the Eighth of March with the team, Zinochka called him to her.
Very quickly she laid a coffee table in the living room, crowning a noble feast with a bottle of expensive cognac, which, almost all, Seryozha drank alone and completely realized.
The night was shameful and disgusting, when it seemed that it was Zinochka who raped a half-dead man, faintly thinking what was going on.
Later, he did not want to continue the relationship. Yes, and Zinochka was disgusted.
So she could not destroy her loneliness. Then, with a difference of several years, there were two or three more attempts that turned out to be no less vulgar. And in men Zinochka was completely disappointed.
When one day, having returned from a banquet from a restaurant, where they again celebrated the Eighth of March, Zinochka went to the mirror, from where an aging woman looked at her for forty, with sad eyes and mouth corners, which were like Yesenin’s cow, she realized that only a child will save her. And so the next day, taking the accumulated time off, she began to act.
Department of guardianship. Some other instances there. Baby House ...
In a word, two months later she was the mother of Yurik - a pretty fair-haired little boy of one and a half years.
At first everything was wonderful. She liked the new role of mom terribly. And she even loved to walk with her son in the square of the Palace of Metallurgists, wearing high-heeled shoes and a flirty hat, which surprisingly intelligently cast a shadow on her face almost to her chin.
Zinochka was in a hurry, and so she sent her son to school already at the age of five, believing that her child would undoubtedly discover all kinds of talents as soon as she crossed the threshold of the educational institution. But somehow all abilities were not detected and were not detected. Moreover, Yurik studied frankly poorly. And so soon Zinochka began to brutally beat him for the slightest offense at school.
Once she noticed that she was almost enjoying it when she did, because she beat the boy and cried, cried, but beat. And she cried out of self-pity. To my life that wasn’t right away. She pitied herself for being left alone, for selling a summer house where she could spend the weekend sitting in silence in nature, and now she is forced to deal with a strange child with obviously bad heredity, who still cannot learn the multiplication table, although she is already in third grade.
For all this, she once took the boy for examination to a psychiatric clinic, where he lay for almost a year. Just before his discharge from there, she came to him and said that through the court she had issued a refusal of motherhood. And after discharge from the clinic, he will go to the orphanage.
The breakup was terrible. When Zinochka returned home, she even cried, clutching a tiny scented handkerchief to the corners of her eyes. It is good that she wore a graceful hat, from under the fields of which passengers in the tram could not see her sincere tears ...
When, after many, many years, a twenty-year-old Yurik with his pregnant wife was standing on the threshold of Zinochkina’s apartment, where she had come to introduce the mother of her unborn child to the only woman whom she called her mother in her life, she opened the doorbell and, blindingly blindly, asked only :
- Who are you?
“Hello, Mom,” he once embarrassed. - Well, I wanted to introduce you to my own ...
Zinochka did not listen. Just answered:
- You are mistaken. I do not know you…
And slammed the door. Now for sure forever.