In the fragmentation time of the work gap, my favorite thing to do is to look at the messages in the background of each platform. Everyone's support and encouragement is a chicken soup that I will never drink, and when everyone is sad and confused, the message platform can also become a tree hole that mothers talk about.
I don’t want to take a message from my child, my mother-in-law and my husband’s message. I also have a lot of words to tell you. It is a personal experience, I hope to have a little reference to everyone.
Mommy also experienced the "Hedgehog trough"
When the rice cake was two months old, my father detected a recurrence of the brain tumor and faced a second craniotomy.
Because I didn't get along well with my mother-in-law in the month, I didn't ask her to help. During the day, I will take care of my father's surgery and hospitalization. I will wait for one night to wake up to a few licking rice cakes. It may be the worst moment in my life.
When I was tired of losing my mind, I even cried and said to my father who had just finished the operation: Why can't you help me at this time, let me be so miserable!
My mother-in-law made a lot of good dishes and sent me to eat more. I was sensitive to excessive nerves: "You don't want me to milk better, feed your grandson to fat?!"
After thinking back and forth, I was so stupid at the time, I wish I could slap myself.
I carefully reflect on it, you should, every new mothers have experienced depression period like that, like a hedgehog - because of the arrival of new life, the intrinsic becomes soft vulnerable, but out in the angular, at any time A little bit of things will be ready for the war.
How to say it, these are mainly pots with dramatic changes in postpartum hormone levels; but in fact, the more important thing is that at that time, I did not find my own direction in the transformation of the role of life.
My father and I are both famous students. But when I was overwhelmed with children and confused about my career, the cake dad was promoted again - the 30-year-old top 500 corporate director, is the most promising year. The daddy drove to work very far, and the work was very busy. It was very late at home. I simply let him go to the study room and calculate carefully. After the birth of the rice cake, he probably slept for a year.
The story is here, you see it, now I am trying to be a little sun, just like you, blaming my aunt, abandoning my mother-in-law, pushing my husband out... these bad things, I have also experienced. The kind of feeling that no one talks, is weak, washes his face with tears, feels that the gods can't save himself, and turns me into a person who is deeply trapped in the negative energy.
Give yourself "find things" and work hard to get out of the circle
Mommy often talks about it now. I am deeply grateful to every fan of Mommy. Because, really, it’s every article that I am pulling out of the quagmire. Message you guys.
How did I get out at the time? It’s because I opened the public number of “Miss Cake Mom”.
I love to visit the mother forum and share the parenting notes. I found that every article below, the mothers are very enthusiastic, which makes me very surprised. It may be that the professionalism of medical students is more serious and the authority of screening materials plays a role.
So, with the encouragement of my friends in the mother group, I started to organize the sleep study notes, the first food supplement for the rice cake, and the nursing problems encountered when taking the rice cake...
I suddenly became very busy. I wanted to read the book, check the information, write articles, and backstage layout after I fell asleep. I was so happy that I was finally happy (it was very cool)!
So, I always like to say this to the team's friends: Busy is the medicine to treat all neuropathy.
This busy state, I suddenly reconciled with the whole world: no longer look at her husband is not pleasing to the eye, call the parents will not say and cry, and then, I took the initiative to invite my in-laws to live with us. Helping to take care of children until now.
Slowly - do you think this happy ending is too sudden, just because I made a self-media number, all problems have been solved?
Of course not so simple. The days are self-exiting, and the mother must be strong enough to be the leader in raising children and coordinating family relationships.
How powerful is it? First, find a strong motivation. My strong source is to become a good mother, to be a good self, to do something interesting, to say that I am forced to do something, I found my mission, just like (I love) Wanwei Steel In the elite day class, "Something bigger than yourself" is a necessary condition for you to transcend yourself.
When I started to use the article to influence more mothers, I found my confidence and a strong mentality: I don't need to wait for someone to save me. I can change the status quo.
So, in the face of family conflicts in the local chicken feathers, the change in mentality is more important than anything else.
Don't be afraid of problems, like a warrior to destroy it
Every family will have a dispute. Parents will also spend a lot of time to convince the children of the rice cakes that they do not need to eat salt. They will also argue that the children can eat ice cream.
To get the mother-in-law, it is to communicate with the day after day, on the premise that the child is good.
There are also secrets. To improve the relationship with your mother-in-law, there are two things that can be done right away:
I am willing to spend a little money for my mother-in-law. The older generation is accustomed to saving, you can buy her some good things that can improve the feeling of life, such as an electric toothbrush, a pair of better shoes. My mother-in-law will say that when I spend this money, I will go out and show off, "This is what my wife bought for me." As long as you buy something for your mother when you buy something for your mother, you really incredible.
The mouth is a little sweeter. I have already said 10086 times this time. I believe that everyone can come up with the emotional intelligence of colleagues and supervisors in the workplace.
Of course, I believe that there will be families that cannot be reconciled with the mother-in-law. If the above two points are completely ineffective for your mother-in-law, then I sincerely suggest that you give up the idea of living together - goodbye, you!
From the heart to please the mother-in-law may be difficult, then ask yourself: Can you get rid of the help of your mother-in-law? My mother-in-law is not doing anything. Can you hold it from both economic and quality of life? The mother-in-law is not here, will you and your husband be happier? If the answer is no, then recognize this reality: you need her. If you need it, you have to compromise. The softness of your attitude is actually convenient. Value!