Why are women getting married? It would seem a strange question. But if you're not reading my first article, then you know that I like to dig deeper than what lies on the surface.
This article is the second in the series "How to get married". The first was why men don't get married.
Here we will look at common female motives for getting married, and you will understand where to go to either get married or improve your existing relationship.
You will also think about the difference between the "purpose of being married" and the "process of being married," which is an unobvious source of many problems in a relationship.
In the end, I will answer a test question from an important material about the four states of the woman and an interesting question from the reader:
"Yaroslav,
a question that would be interesting to read on your blog.
At the moment it is relevant for many of my friends.
Why are men getting married? And how do I get him to ask for a hand and heart? How do I push this step?"
The idea of femininity, the ability to obey and the ability to enjoy the process, giving the man the opportunity to achieve results and make decisions are the red thread in your blog. But what about the girls who live with the guys for 5 years and end up staying at the "broken" (in their opinion) trough?
I have a number of examples when girls almost made an ultimatum to make them an offer (either we get married or we split up - it can't go on like this). But in this case, it is out of the question of femininity.
I wouldn't like to have such a scenario for myself, so I wouldn't want to understand how to behave, so that by the time I want to get married and understand that this is the person I see myself with in the future, I don't have the same hysteria and desire to "command" the process as my acquaintances?
I would be grateful if this topic would interest you and I would soon have the opportunity to read your vision-answer.
Anna".
Everything's in order. So:
Why do women want to get married
Like everybody else or "it's time to go."
Classic. It's either the parents or the environment, or the girl herself has decided that it's bad to be unmarried at this age. Girlfriends, over there were already looking for, children were faked. And she is alone. Ai-ai-ai-ai-ai...
A woman has an unimaginable goal: to get married. And takes action in this direction.
Someone's goal is achieved, but someone does not understand what is wrong. It seems to do everything like a married classmate Tanya, but unlucky.
A friend of hers went to leadership training (in my words - training for men) and set a goal to get married within two months. The goal was achieved. Applause.
...but a year later we got divorced.
Avoiding loneliness
A woman is bored, lonely, unloved job, no hobbies. She sees a way out: to meet the same man and get married.
It seems to her that after getting married, the shades of life will change dramatically to colored ones. Life will make sense.
Once a girl threw me into a cold sweat, saying:
"I had a long depression, my work wasn't going well, I didn't want anything. My friends advised me to find a man, get married, have a child. To distract me from the bad..."
Do we have to explain the tragedy of this thinking? But many people live with similar motives.
By calculation
A friend of a friend got married and flew to the United States. Looking at her husband, it is difficult to understand what she found in him. And love does not smell there.
The motive is simple: marriage by calculation. The husband's father is a dollar multimillionaire.
Do you think it's bad?
Wouldn't rush to conclusions. Previously, he wrote about the statistics of marriages by calculation. They are more long-lived than marriage in love. Why so?
Because a woman looks at the relationship from the beginning soberly and is able to "adapt" to a man, in turn getting the desired from such a marriage.
Do I call for a marriage of convenience? No.
Female realization
Those women who don't agree with what's written below shouldn't waste time trying to prove anything to me, just pass by. So you have another way, and I'm not against it.
The only way a woman can be truly realized is by a man (married).
Marriage is not a goal for her! And the process.
How to distinguish the goal from the process?
In the first two cases, the woman wants to achieve the goal (get the result). To get married, to get married: 1) be like everyone else 2) get rid of loneliness 3) get married with benefit
Only in this variant (true), a woman treats marriage as a process that is going on right now, regardless of whether she is married or not.
And if after three years of relationships a woman suddenly thinks why a man does not offer her marriage, or it's time to get married, all this says about one thing - she perceives marriage as a goal, but not as a process, away, a woman's destiny.
What is the difference?
I will not open America if I say that our external manifestations are the result of what is inside.
So in female behavior towards men.
A woman who realizes that her destiny is to be a man (married), or a woman who has a purpose to marry.
Do you realize that these are two different women in terms of behavior, energy, men's attitudes towards her and her attitude towards men?
The result is that then, tomorrow, never. The process is here and now.
A woman can't get married? So she is too focused on the result, missing out on the process, the pleasure, the life, the excitement of her weakness (from nature).
The woman got married, and the marriage was not so colorful, so she was interested in the result, not the process. If she starts to move into the process (femininity), the marriage will become different (perhaps even better than in American cinema).
Conclusions:
Women marry for different reasons (it's time, lonely, calculated), pursuing a goal (result).
Truly, naturally, naturally (call it what you want) to treat marriage as a woman's vocation, path, life, process.
Husband is a lifestyle for a woman, not a frontier. And then, magically, everything falls into place. Happy woman + successful man = Love.
Conclusion 2:
Girls, we work on ourselves and enjoy life. And of course, reading my useful blog to a reasonable extent.
P. S. Answering the question of the test question from the article "Four states of a woman". Having looked through your more than 30 comments, I was glad. Of course, there were wrong answers, but as they say, there is a chance of success. Thank you for this. And I will just post a screenshot of the comment, to which I have nothing to add. It is called: "Sit down, 5! (5-point each).
Why women want to get married
And then you can include the state of the mistress, playing a couple of scenes from German short films about heavy love.