At the end of July 2008, my son returned to Shanghai from Qingdao. I talked to him. I went to the train station excitedly after work on Friday, and on the way, I got a text from him saying, " I'm not going anywhere this week, I want to be quiet."'My tears came down and I didn't know what had happened to him, it was heartbreaking, for me and for my son,' she said. I have a feeling something has happened.
I'm going back to Beijing to get a Hong Kong-Macau passport and take my son to Hong Kong Disneyland. After I booked my ticket to Beijing on Thursday, I texted him to ask if he was interested in going to Hong Kong with me. He replied, " Not interested."That night, he texted me about an online chat, and I knew it was going to happen. Sure enough, the screen appeared he hit "Sorry for you and son, after the Olympic Games we go back to Beijing to do the formalities," I suddenly tired, suddenly tired to the extreme. I withdrew my ticket back to Beijing, and my body and mind were paralyzed.
Son August no one, he offered to let his son with him for a month. He came on Saturday. Three months of warm time, only two weeks have not seen, this time he repeated without any signs, see him silently avoid me into the guest bedroom (perhaps he is worried that I will ask him, will take the initiative to him, in fact, I am concerned, no love, I can not ML). I suddenly felt that he was funny, my heart love is gone, more humiliation, I no longer want to know why he suddenly turned back, why suddenly again, I do not want to know anything about him, just want to end it all.
He is going to take his son to Suzhou, his son is crying, he is angry. I hope he can be more patient and tolerant to his son, not always fierce son, after all, the son was six years old. I want him to say that I am good, it is not easy, OK, after going to my place, I will let him play games, watch TV, buy good food, but good fun."At that moment, I really can't speak to hate this man, also very strange why I lived with such people for more than ten years, also for him to cry for nearly two years."I couldn't say anything, he went into the bedroom indignantly, and soon snores. I saw his phone on the table, three months before I did not turn over his phone, because I want to believe him, I also hope we have a future, I am waiting for the scar with action to heal, but then look at the sobbing son, listening to the guest lying snoring, I suddenly realized that I was silly, picked up his
On the Friday of the end of July, on the day he said he would not come to Shanghai to pick up his son and need to be quiet, he frequently texted her and dated her; on the same Wednesday, when he inquired about my divorce date on the internet, they were texting frequently, asking " How is it going to be?“
From the beginning of the Year Six, he had been stressing that he and she would not be fruitful, that he had nothing to do with my divorce and her, but that he did not love me;that he had made mistakes, that he was guilty of me and his son, that he could not get over his heart, that he was divorcing me. And she never mind, that is my problem, so I in this year and a half strongly blame introspection; since is to me and son of guilt makes him can not look back, then I will not mention the past, to him better, slowly can be gone......oh, how stupid I was, and he started in the foot, he knew he would instead on the road, stupidly waited for him for a year and a half. The three months he's been through and the damage he's done to me is far greater than it has been for the last year or so.
On the night of the opening of the Olympic Games, we negotiated the terms of the divorce settlement. I clearly realized that the marriage had come to an end and decided to return to Beijing. I found a new job before I had a divorce. I want to get this job, I want to relax for two years, I want to have a chance to live with my son before the divorce, I want to ask him to look after his son for three months, and promised to return immediately after the divorce.
Busy Danish work, simple Danish life, beautiful Danish landscape, 2008 autumn, and winter once made me think that life can never be without trouble, the mood can always sunshine. In November 2008, I returned home to visit my son for a week. he did not pick up nor send me. In December, I returned home from work and immediately renovated the house in Beijing. Fatigue and helplessness were once going to break me. On January 12, 2009, I went to Shanghai to pick up my son. after I said these two years, I hid everything from him, including selling my house for work and taking my son back to Beijing. He had a seizure, accusing me of being selfish, shrewd, loving and manipulative. And cold to say " a few days later in Beijing, divorce procedures.”I promised and said My son although back to Beijing if he wants his son, you can always go to see, our home is always open to him.
I went back to Beijing to pick up my new home, and I was so busy that I was unkempt. On January 14, he received a text message, the effect is to return to Beijing and we calm and quiet life. I had no idea what was going to happen in two days, and his attitude would change so dramatically that I was suddenly surprised to discover that, with his return, I had not had any joy or the excitement-the first time I had found out that I no longer loved him or cared for him. Although the Cold Truth makes the self-proclaimed love I lost, but I know that this is the natural result of two years of his indifferent and irresponsible repeatedly brought, so I accept, accept the fact that I also changed my heart, accept the fact that he asked to come back, whether it is true or false.
He drove for 14 hours and returned to Beijing with all his belongings.we went out to eat together, buy furniture and pick up our son to school together. The only disharmony is that he does not touch me for a moment, even if I am active. After he refused to go with me to my mother's home in Qingdao for the New Year, and after he refused the proposal of a family of three to travel to Hainan for the new year, I could not face the Depression of the spring festival with him alone in Beijing, from where I could not feel any warmth and affection, at the end of January, 2009, I returned to Qingdao alone to be reunited with my son and family.
He came back in the two months, I always have a good sleep every night to be full of a glass of red wine to fall asleep, I always have a healthy cold for two months can not be cured, the stomach also committed three serious, these are due to my intense repeated mood. This time I myself in a fierce struggle, whether or not to continue this Cold Life? For every lonely and sad night, for he reproached me, for his repeated discussion of the past, for his depressive thoughts and dark mind, for his return had seriously affected my mood, and suddenly I greatly missed the quiet days of the first two years without him, only me and my son.
When he accused me again and denigrated my family, I was tired and exhausted. When he summed up sexually, "let's get a divorce", I was relieved and immediately responded. In February, we finally divorced, after he gave up two years of painstaking search for happiness, in I saved the painstaking two years of marriage, in he really want to come back but despair to find that everything has been painted on the end, and he and I have mutual distrust and mutual affection, I scarred, he has no love for me.