7. Clarity and sincerity.
In most psychotherapeutic approaches the boundaries of interaction between the client and the psychologist are clear, unambiguous and clearly observed. This gives the client stability and security, helps him learn to trust and not be afraid of surprises, and subsequently build the same relationship with others.
By the way, this "in the future" applies to all other points: first we give experience, then we help to integrate this experience and be able to maintain this state without the help of a psychologist. It is no coincidence that psychotherapy is called "dress rehearsal of life".
8. In those approaches where the therapist is considered appropriate to share their experiences and experiences, another factor is the view of the client and his behavior.
Due to the sensitivity of the psychologist to his inner world, he hears the reactions arising in response to the client's behavior and can share them. A person receives information about how other people interact with him. And very often this information differs from the client's views.
And in General, in many ways the work of a psychologist is connected with the fact that the client could see his situation from other, unusual for him sides.
9. A healing experience.
It is extremely important for the client to feel that "it happens differently". That you don't always get hurt when you open up.
It is possible to be angry and thus not to lose acceptance of people around and contact with them. You can make mistakes, and you will be supported, not bullied. You can be yourself and not be alone. And so on. There can be a million examples, these are just some of the scenarios familiar to almost all of us.
10. Reinforcement of positive reactions/actions / attitudes.
Even if the psychologist is absolutely sure that he does not convince the client of anything and does not create any model of behavior in the client, I am inclined to believe that this is happening.
Why? Because even an Orthodox psychoanalyst, as detached and neutral as possible, reacts to some phrases of the client, and some do not. Somewhere says" mm-hmm", and somewhere speaks out.
In other approaches, this factor has an even greater impact: by intonation, facial expressions, the slightest manifestations that are read by the client's unconscious, the therapist approves of healthy manifestations and does not support neurotic ones.
11. Modeling.
In addition to the fact that the psychologist reacts in a certain way to the manifestations of the client, he also manifests himself (to varying degrees depending on the approach). And the client unconsciously models the therapist. That is why it is so important for a psychologist to undergo his psychotherapy. His personality should be as elaborate as possible, so that he "translates" healthy patterns of behavior.
Have you ever heard that children learn 90% not on Your words, but on what You do, what you feel and how you show it? Therefore, I am categorically convinced that the best thing a mother can do for her child is not to read books, how to do it, but to develop herself and be the most harmonious person. But this is the topic of a separate article.
And clients are like children in some ways-they grasp what we "broadcast", and not what we say or do.
12. Support motivation.
Well, in the end, the psychologist is the one who can assess the progress of the client, to tell him that he did well when he was able to do something that was not given before. Well, or cheer up when something does not work, and thus maintain motivation.
And it is, in fact, very expensive. Because change is not easy. Even if you really want to.
And our environment, as a rule, without noticing, begins to pull us back. Just because the unconscious of our loved ones is already accustomed to what we were before, and does not want changes. And this despite the fact that on a conscious level, they can fully support us and be hands and feet for something to change.
Very often on the way to the desired life we meet many obstacles. Sometimes we get discouraged. Sometimes it seems that we are going somewhere wrong, or that the path is too long and difficult. The psychologist is the one who will be near. Will support and teach to believe in themselves and itself. He will pass with You the most difficult part of the way until he feels That you do not need more and You can go further already on your own.