It happens at the market, at "my" store of fruits and vegetables.
In front of me, a lady really takes all her time: to choose, to change your mind, to question the saleswoman. Superbly ignoring the long queue that is forming behind her. Or perhaps savoring his power, as a psychoanalyst friend later suggested ...
In any case, the lady takes her time until the last moment: she insists to give extra, looking one by one his little coins in the bottom of his bag.
Meanwhile, in the queue, another lady gets upset, and takes it at once to the tomatoes of the show, in which she methodically drives her raging finger, to see, I suppose, if they are ripe at her will.
And I too start to annoy myself a little of all that, but my little inner alarm then lights up, thankfully: "Bip! Is the stress option essential in this situation? "
No, of course. I perceive that I have the choice. Not the choice of the material situation: I am in the queue, and I do not intend to go past the two ladies by explaining that they are stupid and that I have no time to to lose with their neuroses (by admitting to them that my neurosis is to me not to like to wait).
But I have the choice of my inner attitude: I can continue to watch them and irritate myself by going over criticisms of them; I can also generalize these critics to the human kind ("my God, that people are boring!"); or I can decide that there is really, really more serious, to choose to breathe, to smile, and to have fun with their fancies, or to fool myself and look elsewhere, to the fruits, vegetables, market, life, sky ...
I understand at this moment a lot of things.
That this small effort on my part is not just a stress management exercise but a worldview.
That if I cross this story with a smile and benevolence, then I will reinforce in myself a right vision of the world: "there are serious things and things that are not serious, do not devote an ounce of energy to these, and keep for what really matters. "
That in our lives, everything matters, and that if I get out smartly from this moment, I would have started a software that will help me for the rest of the day, I would have made work the good neural pathways to dedicate to the little adversity, those of hindsight and humor.
That's it, the first lady goes away smiling, happy with her choices. Here is one at least who does not stress at the thought of provoking a long line behind her; no doubt it is a strength, and all the better for her! The second goes very quickly: she knows exactly which tomatoes she wants, to have all palpées.
It's my turn, and I can not help but laugh internally: what am I going to be able to do, unintentionally, to annoy other customers waiting after me?