Some things I have thought for a long time and I have not found a solution. A few days ago, my mother came to see us. My mother was very happy in the first two days, because we all got along very well and were very happy, but in The night before she left, our family decided to eat at home, maybe talk, I had a little dispute with my boyfriend, and I slammed a few times. My mom thought that we seemed to be quarreling, just yell at me and say " I won’t come again after I’m quarreling.” I was in the air and couldn’t come if I couldn’t come. If I’m a predecessor, no matter what I’m wrong with you, you’re jealous of me. Later, my mom didn’t know how to do it. I also said that I am like a shrew, my boyfriend also said that I have to argue with me, no need to find a mother, the more they say the louder, I also picked them up.
I feel very helpless and no one understands. The heart can't bear it. I am going to take a breath of fresh air. My mom thought that I was going to leave, and I gave it to me crying and screaming. I was really unspeakable at the time, in my heart. More is self-blame, and some blame her, I know that her starting point is good, I hope that I can live well with my boyfriend, but I think her method is too radical, people who don’t know think it is I don't make sense to people, get my own mom to squat with myself. My heart is more self-blame, why is it so useless, I want my mother to worry so much. After this incident, I feel very uncomfortable in my heart. Even when breathing, it hurts.
My mother left the next morning. My boyfriend drove her to the station. My mother apologized to her along the way. She said that it was because she had done this. In fact, she didn’t know that the more she was, the more uncomfortable I felt. It’s my filial piety to let my mother worry about it. On the other hand, after she did this, I don’t know what attitude and method I should use to continue walking with my boyfriend. I can’t find a way. Later I The mother went home. She asked my uncles and uncles to call me and said that I was older. Don’t give up my boyfriend easily. In short, they told me one by one, and they made me think clearly. Don't regret it, live with my boyfriend. I feel that the pressure is so great that I can't breathe. I can't breathe when I breathe.
My mother did this while sending a message to my boyfriend, saying that he was all tolerant of me, that we should live together, and apologize there. I felt more uncomfortable after seeing it, as if our family were Asking my boyfriend to let him not give up on me, I feel that a very small thing does not need to be done like this, I am not doing anything, just ordinary bickering, she does so in the face of my boyfriend in the future How can I lift my head, how can I face him? I really don't know. And I walked with my boyfriend. From the beginning to the present, I have been insisting on maintaining it. He used to I don't care, I am carrying on to other women, I am silently accepting, why is it so small now that my mother is asking for him like this, I really can't understand. I know he changed it. I know that he has been constantly striving to improve, and it will be good for us, but now I really don't know how to deal with it. I am still hurting my heart.
Hello there! I am afraid you still need to have a good talk with your mother. On the basis of affirming her and understanding her, she points out her inadequacies. First of all, parents should not interfere too much with their children's emotional life, even if it is good intentions, but often good intentions will lead to big mistakes, the more help and the more busy. Parents should have full confidence in their children and give them the freedom to solve their own emotional problems independently.
Secondly, your mother is worried that you missed your boyfriend and even asked you to make a decision. In fact, if a relationship is acquired and sustained by forbearance, what is the significance of this relationship? What happiness is there? It’s better to miss it and start over. Of course, this does not mean that you and your boyfriend, but just a statement. You also mentioned the change of your boyfriend. Since this is the case, both sides are happy.
Again, as you mentioned, it is not necessarily a good thing to put yourself too low. The two sides of the relationship should be equal, and your mother should have the attitude and demeanor of the elders as an elder.
Communicate these things with your mother, don't quarrel, control your emotions, calm down and discuss in the area, and listen to your mother's thoughts. She may have a lot of worries that require you to solve.
As for the boyfriend, you can also talk to him, listen to his views on this matter, tell him that you think and feel confused in this matter, and even ask him to help you analyze and give you some Suggestions, how should this matter be solved. In fact, if you are willing to open up to him and seek his comfort and help, perhaps this matter can make your feelings more intimate.