What is personal self-development? At first glance, it is not clear what it is, but it is clear that something good. It is not clear because this concept is abstract. And it is possible to develop purposefully only absolutely concrete things. In this same phrase double abstraction: personality and self-development.
Even in psychology, not one definition of personality, when it comes to the average person, he does not think about definitions. Before to develop something it would be nice to understand what it is.
If we touch on the term self-development, then there is uncertainty. For example, how do we know that something is evolving and not degrading? To do this, you need to have at least criteria.
In order to carry out personal self-development, it is necessary to determine what specific qualities of personality we will develop, as well as to determine the criteria by which we will understand it.
For example, if we determined that you want to develop this quality of personality as “punctuality”, we have to translate it into the language of facts: never be late, do all the time, etc. Then we can determine the level of punctuality in the moment. For example, a person has determined that he is late in three cases out of ten. Accordingly, in his case the development will be considered, if he will be late or less will no longer be late at all.
Why is it important to specify what personal self-development is?
Quite often I see how people begin to develop. They usually mean something like meditation or yoga. I have nothing against either, but these activities are not a panacea for everything. This means that they can not develop personality in all directions. As there can be no cure for all diseases.
How do people come to the desire for self-development? Usually, they feel that not everything in their life is as good as they would like. People understand that something has to be done about it. However, for some reason, they do not know what exactly in their personality does not suit them and then they begin to look for some “powerful tool” that will deal with all the problems itself. Usually people just appeal to some raspiarennomu method. Method incidentally can be a good, but for anything another.
Only a clear statement of goals and objectives can ensure development. Otherwise, we fall into a mental trap, which I call “illusion of movement”, when we only pretend that we are trying to develop something.
Rules of personal self-development
In order not to waste time, and effectively change something in your life, I made a set of rules that will not stray from the path of personal self-development.
1. Translate abstract desires into facts that can be recorded and measured
For example, the man decided that his personality lack of care, moral behavior, etc. Then he needs to decipher what he meant thereby, and to assume any obligations by which it will assess their self-development.
2. Any practice improvement coaches only those skills which is
For example, if you decide to improve your driving skills, then yoga classes will not help you in this. Need to drive.
If you want to become stronger, you need to go to the gym, not meditate.
If you want to become more calm, you need to learn to regulate your emotional state. That's where meditation is useful.
If you want to become more moral, you have to do moral things. Prayers won't help here.
In short, if you are self-improving in something, then you should do exactly what you are improving.
3. Persistence
In our world, you can't change things quickly. All processes in it proceed smoothly. Including changes in our personality. Therefore, the most important thing that can be in self — development is the constancy of our efforts. Changing yourself is almost as difficult as changing the world. But a stubborn man can do it.
4. Responsibility to yourself
When you work on your personal qualities, you can not hack. You can't fool yourself. It's everyday hard work. It must be remembered that we work for the result, and not in order to produce an imitation of the activity.
No one will monitor and verify. You're the only boss here.
5. Keep the focus on the goal of self-development.
In the process activities very easily look away and start to do something another. If this happens, then we will achieve something else. Therefore, we should always keep in mind what we are trying for. Constantly check their actions with the goal to which we are going.
Without these five rules, personal self-development will be significantly hampered.