Our pharmacies are swamped with malignant medications! I am telling you as a person who knows the depth of the question.
It happened here because of them, in a rather tricky situation.
The other day my stomach got sick. My body suffers and I cannot go to the toilet properly. I can't do it. As in highly developed countries, my wife bought me pills for constipation. This is what they do all over the world. Pharmacists protect our health.
Sick? You are wearing a pill and do not suffer!
You should rest better on the toilet. Don't keep it to yourself, as they say.
Previously, such issues were solved by prunes. Now the dried fruit hits hard at a price. Pills are cheaper...
Since the evening I took a miracle pill and waited. I listen to my long-suffering organism.
No reaction, at least kill me. I curse pharmacology in my mind...
And my face has already taken a gray shade and from this, I certainly experience spiritual and physical suffering. My stomach falls out. Kids and even a cat are hovering away from my disease.
At night it's okay, in the morning it's quiet again. There are no calls to relief!
I run to work. I'm in a hurry not to be caught on the road.
I succeeded, but again there is no reaction to the pill.
And I want to free myself from unnecessary thoughts only...
With my partner, I got a discharge for cargo delivery, a travel sheet and on the way.
We are going to the first address. I am anxiously listening to the stomach. Are there any actions from the pills?
Silence, even, on the contrary, it is disgusting to think about the toilet. My thoughts are getting more and more stupid: I think about the Renaissance and the Renaissance...
Okay, I think. It will be formed somehow.
Half an hour has passed, but we started at traffic lights. Suddenly there was an internal drilling! The struggle of the pill with intestines began!
My ears were covered with...
Screaming to Sergei: - Stop the son of a bitch!
I roar with bass and tear off my vocal cords.
- Pullover right here and now. I need to go to the bathroom right away. I can't stand it!
Sergiy urgently slows down. My eyes are filled with genuine fear. He looks at me with horror.
I respond to him with the same ones. I rotate my eyes in different directions and my face is red.
I fly a bullet out of the cockpit and rush straight ahead without taking apart the road, pushing rare passers-by.
I see a fast-food restaurant on course and a hamburger with a clown hanging on the poster.
I fly in a bullet, looking for a rescue sign Water Closet.
There is one! A little to the left and straight. Fly in. Two cabins and both are free. Lucky you!
I plow on the toilet, drop my pants and enjoy studying the ceiling lamps.
Oh, yes, a pill! It was an infection. She cleaned me properly. Lost a kilo of weight by 10, no less. Peeing my ass...
I exhaled. I have to go out. It's time! I examine the plastic block with a hole in it, for the presence of a roll of toilet paper.
Empty infection! There is no paper there.
That's not a problem.
I think maybe there is a bushing? I will stretch it some time and try to use it for other purposes. Let the paper factory know that our man has a waste-free production.
Also no. Even the bushing has already been used by such people.
The same brave uncle sat here before me...
I hear voices. Women's. They laugh funny and lock themselves in booths.
Oh, my God, what's going on?
I look around. I see in the bucket behind the toilet, items of female hygiene...
An ambush! I got right into the enemy's rear. I am surrounded by the opposite sex. Baba's toilet. I confused the door in a stressful state.
Triangles on the plate looked up and down with sharp corners.
But I could see I was looking only at the circles of heads above them...
What to do?
The main thing is not to lose face and get out of the situation with your head proudly raised.
And the doors of the booths keep slamming all the time. Probably, the women's delegation arrived at a symposium of some kind. Ladies need help without stopping. There is no possibility to take and just leave. There will be a scream...
Lurking. I felt the phone receiver in my pocket. I won't be able to talk on it. The next cabins will calculate me on it.
There will be screams again! They will accuse me of all mortal sins and what good will be shown in the evening edition of the Duty Department.
They will glorify the whole city, you will not wash away later.
I'm texting Sergei, saying help me out. I'm stuck in a women's latrine. I can't get out and there is no paper also.
He calls back. I drop it. I can't speak in a man's voice in the ladies' room.
Can hear.
I type him a text again. They say women all around, and accusations of sexism can follow. Help me out!
Now it's very easy with this. One video on YouTube and you have already collected a million likes and repost from the toilet. Wild time!
I can imagine the headlines of the newspapers "Big Mac is a maniac from Bibirevo".
I've got it all figured out. I imagined what my wife would say if she didn't kill me, of course. How to look at children in the eyes? After the folder is weakened like that?...
There's movement in the next cockpit. Some aunt put on the floor a lady's bag and probably sits on the toilet like me.
I took out a pack of wet napkins from the bag, and I recognize them by the rustling, my wife carries the same with her.
And I put them on the floor, next to the bag.
I saw a tutu between the booths and like a royal cobra in a throw, the rapid movement of the brush grabbed the tutu and instantly opened the tutu with napkins and threw it back.
The aunt in the next cabin grumbled dissatisfactory, saying not to ask for fate? We lost all conscience. The student probably, but so behaves.
I lay low and will not move.
Tychonechko finished the procedure, pulled up his pants and was waiting for the ladies' room to empty.
My aunt wasted a little more weight, washed her hands and came out slamming the door.
I listen, like no one else.
I jump out of the booth and run to the sink. Next to the mop and bucket.
I grab them.
The door opens and two ladies come in.
I stop them and say, "Wait until they are dry and send them back to the corridor.
I go out of the ladies' room myself, put a mop and a bucket on the door:
- Now it is possible. Come in...
It's gone! Both literally and figuratively.
I fall into the men's room. I need to take a breath. Around the native faces of the men. The happy ones are in need and crowd near urinals.
How dear you are to me, my brothers! How I love you all. I am ready to hug and kiss these wrinkled, unshaven and hangover faces.
I washed my hands, rinsed my face, and a happy man went outside.
Sergei smokes nervously at the car and points at the clock, saying we are running out of schedule.
- What kind of texts did you write to me and why didn't you pick up the phone, almost an hour passed? - he's interested.
I keep silent and shrug my shoulders.
- In my pocket, I must have accidentally pressed the buttons while I was sitting on the toilet, and I answer, drop my cigarette and let's go...
Finally, we are going. I think to myself. So it's easy, because of the harmful effects of these drugs, you can happen to be a maniac. By the will of the accident...
The main thing is not to tell anyone about such a sinful fall. Wrong people will understand, they are now all nervous and restless.
They all need to be treated with pills, just like I was treated today.
And he was cured in such a way that you won't wish the enemy... But, as they say, it was carried away!