About toilet fears and other difficulties in the transition to the pot.
Children's development is a process full of surprises. One of them may become accustomed to the pot. Suddenly, it may turn out that your child has difficulty in this delicate matter. Some children refuse immediately, some after experiencing some discomfort, although the transition from a diaper to a pot went smoothly.
A critical scenario is as follows: each "toilet trip" ends in tears, persuasions and instructions do not help, the child endures as much as possible, sometimes does not go to the toilet for a few days, constipation begins and has to seek medical help. Psychologists also come to the aid, relieving the children's tension and helping parents, which speeds up the achievement of a positive result.
Toilet difficulties cause special surprise to parents, as it seems to us that this is a simple process and nothing difficult can be here. This is not true: for a child, it is a separate task. Suffice it to recall that the transition from diaper to pot requires a host of factors:
1) Physiological readiness. The child has bladder and bowel sphincter muscles.
2) Psychological preparedness. The child understands that he or she has peed, for example, and tells adults about it; it is important for him or her to be clean.
3) Emotional readiness. The child has a quiet attitude to the pot, easily transplanted on it. Many children experience a certain squeamish attitude in front of the pot, are afraid to sit on it, etc. This side of the question also needs to get used to.
Any attempts to speed up this process will lead to the opposite - everything will be more difficult and slower.
Toilet Fears appear when the child is not ready for the transition, but adults are no longer ready to wait. They insist on a pot, scold the diapers and shame the child if he continues to use them, "as a little." And to avoid all this, the child in every possible way to avoid these unpleasant procedures and conversations, he begins to tolerate, hold back and do not notice the urge of the body. This leads to constipation or to compromises when the child, on the contrary, ceases to control the intestines.
What to do if it is difficult to switch to a pot?
1. Consult a pediatrician. There are nuances that are best discussed with your doctor. Usually, we are talking about a special diet and plant laxatives, although there are exceptions.
2. Test yourself. If you at least sometimes reproach your child for "toilet failures", it may be the reason why it is difficult for him to make this transition. Moreover, until he is ready on all points (see above), nothing will work out. So the best way to help is to stop rushing.
3. Work with a child psychologist. If the "toilet theme" has been bothering you for more than a month, then, most likely, the child is tense enough.
When parents catch the real pace of the child and go with him. Gradually, he himself refuses diapers, as tacitly evidenced by the number of, for example, first graders in diapers. That is, if the child does not have features that slow down or do not allow him to use the toilet on his own, he will start using it. Another thing is that it is not about letting it go and waiting for the child to learn everything himself. He needs our reasonable help.
How to help a child learn "toilet skills
1. Identify the words you use to describe what happens to the child. It is important that everyone at home uses the same dictionary.
2. Make sure that the pot is easily accessible to the child, he or she can use it on his or her own. If it is a toilet, it should have a special seat and footrest on it.
3. Encourage the child to talk about what he or she wants to use the toilet. Praise him, even if he hasn't said anything.
4. Make the transition from diapers to regular panties a special event. Many kids like to do something like adults, which may inspire yours as well.
5. Avoid punishment and reproach for "failures". We talked about it in more detail above.
6. Agree with all adults on a common strategy of behaving as one.
