How to influence people - move on to action
John Kehoe says:
Each person is unique, unique and deserves respect. Everyone is a star.
First: awareness
In other words, realize that, indeed, each person is unique and beautiful, even your annoying boss is a star, a unique creature! You must have respect for all people before addressing the issue of how to influence people. You should come to realize that every person is unique and divine.
Learn to see more than each person sees in himself. There is a grain of greatness inside each, and you give people a chance when you see their potential, their soul, their inner beauty and their talents behind their shortcomings and problems.
Second: visualization
After the realization that each person is a star, after you understand that you need to see in people much more than they see in themselves, you need to catch your mood for this person. And if you are friendly, then you can now do the visualization.
Imagine a person smiling, happy. Every day, visualize how happy a person is to see you and how a smile spreads from your compliments. And then he will definitely become much nicer and kinder.
There is another equally effective way. I share it with you too, so that you know exactly how to influence people.
Colin Tipping Method - Radical Forgiveness
Colin Tipping devoted his work to transforming the state of the victim into the state of the creator. His method allows you to teach awareness, self-acceptance, improve relationships.
It often happens that you really want to establish a relationship with a person, but there is a huge baggage: a lot of grievances, fears. And all this past experience interferes: we would like to establish communication, but something does not go well and does not stick together.
How to let go and forgive the past?
Sometimes, it seems to us that everything is fine, but somewhere deep down inside us sits a grudge against a person and he pushes away from us, feeling this. Or a person hurts you again and again.
Colin Tipping draws attention to three stages:
First step
It is necessary to write down all your feelings - as much as possible having plunged into your victim role and having experienced all the sensations from this role and situation to the end.
That is, release all your emotions, do not hold anger or pain in yourself, feel, “sore” this moment. Listen to yourself, to your feelings. What thoughts are spinning in your head, what do you think of this situation? Analyze what happened, take a sheet and pen and write down everything in detail.
Second phase
Look at the situation analytically, revealing what our attitudes are in our feelings and, possibly, finding their roots in childhood, realizing that our partner only mirrors them, showing us our shortcomings and what needs to be corrected and cured.
That is, you need to realize yourself. The people around us are our mirror. We see the most accurate reflection of ourselves and our attitudes thanks to our loved ones.
If your loved one offended you, upset you, do not rush to curse him or be angry. Accept the situation and understand: your loved one is innocent, it only reflects your essence to you.
And only huge work on yourself and forgiveness of the offender will allow you to grow and move on. You need to understand that the current situation happened because the world reflects your blocks, attitudes, fears, thoughts, emotions and feelings. This is the way of the Universe to show what you need to correct in yourself in order to rise one step higher.
Write down everything that you think and feel about the current situation, analyze if you have met such thoughts in the past? It is very important to understand where the legs grow from: most often negative attitudes come from childhood, or from another past experience.
Third stage
To thank our "tormentor" for the voluntary obligations undertaken to help us and to radically forgive him.
In other words, it is necessary to take full responsibility. You are the creator, and only you create your reality. Thank your “tormentor”, because he was given a difficult role: to reflect your thoughts, blocks, fears, attitudes. Remember that as soon as you do your work on yourself, your mirror will change.
And now I want to share with you the stories of real people who managed to change themselves and change the very reflection: they were able to influence people and situations.
Here it is, the main secret, how to influence people
It is very important to understand that you are a creator and create all situations and relationships with people yourself. It is in your power to fall in love and charm, in your power to make you hate. Reality always reflects what is inside you.
Do not blame people for the fact that they behave somehow wrong. They are just your reflection. Work on yourself so that your reality becomes pleasing to you. Do not react to the mirror and do not scold the reflection. Change yourself and the mirror will reflect your work.
As you now understand, in order to influence people, you need to work on yourself. Since each person is your reflection, it is important to thank the person for revealing to you your essence and in this way you understand how you need to change yourself.
Treating people in advance with love and respect, you will only encounter the same attitude towards yourself. And then you don’t have to wonder how to influence people. Remember, you are changing - your world is changing, the people around you are changing and their attitude towards you is changing.