According to a study from Nielsen in 2009, on average we spend 8.5 hours each day on our screens. I imagine this has only increased since phones have gotten better. Despite not always liking the experience, if left unchecked, we want our phones badly enough to spend hours a day on it.
“I don’t think any man or woman on his or her deathbed ever wished he or she had spent more time sending IMs or playing online poker, either. But hell, I could be wrong,” writes author Stephen King.
Yet our love of, or addiction to, screens is why Medium founder Ev Williams and the late Apple and Pixar CEO Steve Jobs made sure they limited the amount of technology at home. Technology is hard to get away from — it’s gotten to the point where people need full detoxes away from it (recent high-profile examples: Selena Gomez and Michelle Phan).
As this study from the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships shows, even just the mere “presence of mobile phones can interfere with human relationships, an effect that is most clear when individuals are discussing personally meaningful topics.”
This is why it’s more important than ever to create screen-free spaces in your life. You can start by setting one of these up in your home (where meaningful and deep relationships are the most important).
If screens are the default, you’ll need a place where you’ve drawn a boundary and that your phone can’t enter.
In a screen-free space, you’ll build the habit of not using your phone in this room or area. You have a refuge when you’re overwhelmed from notifications. You can read books again (libraries are considering screen-free spaces). And, you’ll have a place to go where you want to chat with your family and friends, uninterrupted.
As a first step, you could start with keeping your phone out of your bedroom, so you’re not tempted to check email before you sleep. Not only will it reduce your anxiety, you’ll also probably sleep better because there’s less blue light.
Alternatively, instead of spaces, you could also set up screen-free times in your life. “Hamlet’s BlackBerry” author William Powers turns off his family’s modem each Friday night at bedtime, and leaves it off until Monday morning. He did this to give his family more time together. “Sprint” author Jake Knapp set his home’s router to shut off each night at 9PM, which gave him enough time to write a book.
Leave your phone out of the screen-free space — and deliberately make it less convenient for you to check it. Whether it’s creative output, deeper relationships, or just a greater peace of mind and rest, your brain will thank you for it.