What do you call a man that not only likes you, but also him? You lovingly call the guy "masey” or" sun”, and he begins to twitch his eye and he insists not to repeat it in public. You honestly wonder what I've done. Wanted say something gentle, and he, “a dork heartless”, not valued.
My dear, do you really think it's okay to call a bearded six – foot man a “baby”? Do you ever wonder how these nicknames affect a man? "Chick, cat, Bunny” - not relations, and some bushy zoo.
I suggest you turn on your powers of observation and look around. Start with the young mothers who walk with their sons. How do they communicate with them? "You're my little one, you're my pretty one," she raises him like that, with all her love and tenderness! And then you women wonder how there are so many weak men?
See what was the matter: girls and boys need to educate differently.
• The girl need to praise “just because”. Because she is beautiful, kind, gentle. And not for the fact that" cooked delicious soup "or"knitted socks."
* Boys, on the contrary, can not be praised. And if you see that some mother shakes over the child, and enjoys his every word or action-she brings up a " Mama's son." Because normal a man will grow only the a boy, which praise dotted, for certain achievements."Look, what my son has collected a cool helicopter" - sounds much more correct than: “My sun, my sweet boy, so well done at my mother. ” For the boy, small victories are an additional motivational kick, an incentive to conquer new heights.
The same system applies to adults. If you want to be next to you was a strong, reliable man-he a priori can not be "masik” or "Pupsik". Because all these diminutive nicknames guys relax.
Imagine the situation: your man comes home after a hard day's work. He's angry and tired and upset about something. What would a wise woman do? She just leave him alone, and when the partner is more or less back to normal – will give him moral support. Ask how he was doing and instill in him the confidence that everything is sure to get better, because he is "the strongest and best man in the world." And he will. And the next day he will have the strength and motivation to go further, to solve problems, to achieve their goals.
What do many girls? They say, " Oh, you poor thing, lie down for a while. And generally come on the job, she's not worth your nerves”!
Yes, it's nice for a man to be worried about him, to be pitied. But remember, pity is the most humiliating feeling. It is pity that makes women live with alcoholics, tyrants and weak men.
• Does it make men stronger? No.
* Do they want to change, to achieve something? No.
* Does a man's life change because you feel sorry for him? Either.
Funny nicknames
Lovers often give each other nicknames – and this is normal. Only need to remember two nuances:
* Nicknames, in a sense, are intimate. And outsiders don't have to know you call him “my drunk macho.” Just put yourself in the guy's shoes: how would you feel if your girlfriends found out he called you his “gentle Kraken”? Awkward, isn't it?
* They should not be offensive. Admit it, “my evil genius "sounds mysterious, but" my fatso” - somehow not very.You don't suspect how to kill the self-esteem of men, affectionately calling him “lazy tylenchina”.
I please don't call your man “zaey ”. This nickname is now so common that if you shout in the store " Zai " - will turn 90 men out of 100. Be creative and come up with something individual, just for you.
Inspire and motivate!
You know, when I get a call from a friend or a good friend, I can answer in style.:
* Hello, world's best art Director!
* Hello, Winner on life!
* How you doing, Champ?
Why am I doing this? To gently lift his spirits. A trifle, and it is pleasant to it. This treatment charges, uplifting. Now imagine if the guy would say such a girlfriend? Yes, he after this-the mountains will turn!
Let me offer you a few more options that are sure to please your man:
• Which reflect your attitude to him: my beloved, darling, dear, the best.
* That emphasize his quality: the most a strong, a bold, courageous.
* Words that will please him: my man, my hero, my champion, my winner, the best in the world, my teacher, my master, my lion.
• By name. It is best to pronounce the name completely-Valery, Yaroslav, Gregory. Diminutive like Ksunechka and Kolya on the people do not have to use. You'll ruin your man's reputation.
Don't you dare call a man “hero” or “master”? Are you sure you're with a decent man?
If a woman is happy in a relationship-she does not hide it. And her lips “my hero” doesn't sound like flattery, but as a recognition of masculinity.
Train
Eradicate from their speech humiliating “seals” and “masik”. Talk to your man the way he likes it. Do not confuse pity with love: if you want to have a strong partner next to you – forget about the words “my pretty”, “poor”, “darling ”. Just forget.
If you're not sure if you're doing the right thing, ask yourself the question: how does it feel to be a man next to me? Strong, courageous, confident or weak pussy, who needs not a wife, but another mother?
You can say: well, I'm trying to show affection, care. Believe me, there are many more effective ways:
Become for men support. * Don't wipe his snot like a loving mother, just be there for him. Show, that for you he still remains strong and the best a man, and everything else – temporary difficulties.
* Demonstrate their behavior, that he for you need and is important. If he comes home from work, your reaction should not be "Borscht on the stove, I went to watch TV series”, and" Hello, my love! How was your day”" Take an interest in your man's Affairs, become a part of his life.
* Thank him for what he does for you. Honey, seriously, do you often say a simple “thank you”to your man? For driving you to work or taking out the trash or buying you a fur coat? Or maybe you think that everything is as it should be and it is his sacred duty? Then don't be surprised if in a couple of months he just doesn't want to please you. You don't appreciate it.
And if you master this simple science-your man will do everything possible and impossible to make you happy.