Some time back, I was in the throes of a miserable writer’s block.
My ideas just seemed to have dried away. No amount of coaxing the little grey cells of my mind, even brought an iota of idea to write. Nothing all around me gave me even a glimmer of inspiration to ink my blank sheets of paper. Needless to say, I was frustrated and unhappy with myself till no end.
Then one evening, as I was sitting in my courtyard, glumly staring at the disappearing sun, I received some “great” advice from my esteemed neighbor.
“Ravi, you are doing everything wrong as a writer. The only reason, why you are not able to churn “constant stuff” is that, you are not following the effective habits of successful writers. Those writers are successful because they have a “dedicated” routine in place. Take my advice, read and follow some great habits of these guys, then sky will be the limit for you!”.
Since I had nothing better to do (My ideas had dried up !! remember ?), I thought, why not give it a shot for the next 3–4 days and see the result.
For the next 4 days, I gobbled, read and emulated the effective, weird habits of multiple writers across the globe. I made myself the “guinea pig” for experimentation as I began to live, breathe, eat their fascinating lives to the last comma.
However, At the end of the 4rth day, l came back to my senses and left this human experiment, exasperated and feeling stupid. I realized at last, that I am attempting to cross an ocean clutching a straw, which itself is not meant for me at first place.
Here is Why-:
I am not a Morning Person
Our Great writer XXX wakes up at 4.00 AM in the morning every day. He just jumps out of bed immediately without pressing the snooze button. He starts his day with a Hot “social media” session for 1 hour, answering all his tweets, fan mails, Facebook posts and what not. This not only brightens his day, but also gives him a fabulous ego massage. Soon After that, sharp at 5.00 AM, he will sit and start writing along with a hot glass of Gluten free milk mixed with organic eggs.
“Wow! What an amazing guy!!! This is the secret of his success. I must emulate him to the last comma.”
“Wait a minute!!! Where can I get this “Gluten free milk”. Never mind, I will get it somehow. It plays a vital role in his success!!!”
The Result
I got up the 1st day and slept off again. I again summoned all my will power and got up the 2nd day to write 2 sentences before sleeping off again. I did not even bother to attempt it, in the next two days.
I am not a Health Freak
Our Great writer XXX is a fitness freak. He runs 10 miles a day on a hilly terrain. This it seems, helps him to “open” his mind and “fill” it with dazzling ideas to write about. He also follows the run with an exotic smoothie made up of a unique combination of raspberries, avocados, green chilies and Brazilian green coffee beans, plucked at the first rays of sunrise (the timing is very important !!). He finally finishes the run with a full body massage with palm oil and organic clay.
“Gosh! That is a tall order. I have never been too fond of such Health stuff. That is why I am such a dumb failure.”
The Result
I ran 10 meters before my legs surrendered miserably. Later the “smoothie” plays havoc on my bowels which made me spend a majority of my time, running to the loo!!
I tend to Sleep in Bed
Our Great writer XXX loves lying in bed to set his focus and creativity in writing. This it seems, helps him to find the right inspiration and the right words, while he is cozily ensconced within the comfort of his bed. His productivity is amazing, as he churns out volumes of pages, without much effort. He claims to be a “completely horizontal writer” because he cannot think and write unless he is lying down.
“Wow, this guy is amazing. This is the secret of his success. The “bed” must be imparting some intellectual waves which makes his brain hyper productive. I must immediately ditch my habit of trying to get ideas while travelling or talking to people. I must be smart like him.”
The Result
I went to the bed with all my writing equipment and immediately went off to sleep.
I do not have an Exquisite Mahogany Desk
Our Great writer XXX is very particular about the desk on which he writes his magic. His desk is a clean, uncluttered expanse of rich mahogany, inlayed with exquisite hand crafted designs of ancient eras. This desk, it seems inspires him to “think outside the box” and come up with outstanding ideas. He also loves taping it with index cards with quotes or Kafka or Don DeLillo, which inspires him, every time he looks at them.
“Wow, this desk is amazing but frightfully expensive for a poor writer like me. Anyway I will beg, borrow and steal and do anything to make sure, I get this desk in my possession.”
The Result
I banged my head on the desk for three days without any significant result. On the fourth day, I sold it at EBay at half the price.
I cannot hang upside down and write
Our Great writer XXX believes that hanging upside down is a cure for writer’s block. According to him, when he does this so-called inversion therapy, it helps him relax and concentrate better on his writing. The more he does it, the more he feels relieved and inspired to write. This it seems, is the single biggest secret of his churning worldwide best sellers on a regular basis.
“Gosh, this is a tall order and looks much beyond my physical and mental capacity. Let me give it a shot though”
The Result
My good sense prevailed over me at this point. I did not even bother to attempt this acrobatic style of writing and thus saved my body from disastrous consequences.
The One Lesson I learned
It is not wrong to get inspired from great writers and learn from them but we must also understand that, there is a very thin line between “inspired from” and “copied from” and once we cross that, we are certainly doomed to failure.
All of us have distinct capabilities, which are a result of our unique upbringing, experiences and way of viewing life. There is no point in “diluting” our talents and attempting to ape someone else, which mostly does not work. What works brilliantly for others, may be an utter failure for you.